ad:tech NY Day 3: Jimmy Wales, the Wikipedia guy 10:21 AM EST

Key takeaway: Jimmy Wales manages to make me feel optimistic after a very cranky finish last night.

Jimmy identifies himself as an Objectivist. I bet he’s all over that new Ayn Rand bio. That thing is everywhere. If you ever need to watch a really bad movie, get The Fountainhead. As bad as it is, I think it still may be better than the book. Man, don’t drop that thing on your foot.

Jimmy just quoted Charles van Doren. Despite its glacial pace, I love Quiz Show. Ralph Fiennes is dreamy. CvD said encyclopedias should be radical, and Jimmy’s baby, Wikipedia, is. It democratizes information. I’m all for that, even though I was cheering for elitist standard-bearer Charles van Doren to win over the populist representative that John Turturro plays, due to the dreamy factor.

Jimmy’s picture looks like Clinton of Clinton and Stacy, but he doesn’t really look like that in person, so I guess I should refrain from asking him to critique my ensemble. He thinks people are getting smarter. Wikipedia helps them get smarter, even though the info is not all, how you say, written by experts. He wants Wikipedia to be more accessible and usable to people all over the world, so I’m starting to like him despite the Ayn Rand thing. Wow, w.pedia (he pronounces it “wi-key-pedia) is the 14th most popular site in Iran. There’s a geek culture that transcends nationality. Geeks the world over! I would so love to see an international geek consortium, with people in fabulous national costume all wearing big Elvis Costello glasses.

Gourmet went out of business because they weren’t feeding the needs of advertisers and consumers. Well, I’m glad it’s not because the print industry is dying a slow and miserable death.

Geeks everywhere are evangelists now. What kind of evangelists? Brand evangelists! Branding companies need to use wikis. Jimmy just admitted that was his sales pitch. Well, he’s transparent. So was Sir. He didn’t hide the fact that he wants to own South America now. Oh, here’s the requisite picture of a cute kid holding a plant introducing the wikia green initiative, which Jimmy has high hopes for. IT’S…..LADY GAGA!!!! Jimmy, you have stolen my heart. Gagapedia!! I bet it has pictures of those muppet dresses.

OH MY GOD, we are now looking at the Muppet wiki!! Jimmy has taken over my stream of consciousness. But I can go gently into that good night, because I’m pretty tired. Take my stream of consciousness, please.

Wikia via Jimmy says, “Be Bold.” Dude, I would so not even be here if I weren’t 100% on board with that.

“Assume Good Faith.” As opposed to bloggers, who are cranky and argumentative, wiki culture is collaborative and nicer. If someone busts your wiki, they probably are trying to help. So they’re probably not a blogger.

“Quality Matters.” Wiki communities have the power to control, and to ban trouble makers. Trouble makers can have their own wikis on making trouble. Bloggers, there’s a place for you.

Wikipedia will always be free. And on that happy note, I’m out.

ad:tech NY Day 2: Creative Showcase II

Key takeaway: The acronym for Nothing New Under the Sun is NNUtS. That’s a bit awesome.

The Broad is weary.

Mazda wants to start a revolution of joy. Another one of these “hide the car keys.” You know, we had this idea for Audi back in 2001. Was there money? No, there was not.

This guy’s talking about a dystopia “somewhere in the future, say 3, 400 years,” where the government controls everything. Um…dude, the fact that you think this is that far away and not happening right now shows how well the government’s succeeding. “The Mazda is the secret to unlocking joy in the future.” I mean….no comment.

I imagine my elite group of readers are as ready to read a short post as I am to write one. You have your wish. This is BB, signing off until tomorrow, heading out to Brooklyn to get a breath of fresh air.

ad:tech NY Day 2: Creative Showcase I 3:57 PM EST

Key takeaway: Think fresh. But please don’t be a jerk with your metaphors. I mean, I get that ad people are insanely cynical, but the low achieved here was low indeed.

“In our choice overloaded world, the future belongs to brands with a distinctive point of view and contagious brand ideas that ignite conversations about the brand and accelerate brand growth.” You know, this is exactly the sort of thing I get stuck writing when we have to do a case study or something, and I really try not to be that verbose but….well, sometimes I’m sure I am.

Well, the first thing onscreen is this weird graphic of a white sponge with dots on it that are supposed to look like…contagion. Ew.

Oh, here’s one of those dancing events in a train station. It’s in Liverpool, and yet does not feature the Beatles. Missed opportunity? Only you can decide. I still prefer the Sound of Music one.

“We believe the best way to change the brand conversation is to have more positive comments than negative.” Spoken in a British accent. Need I say more?

There’s one of those axis things. We need to be in the top right hand corner! You know what I like? The nice/mean/smart/dumb axis. You can use it for absolutely anyone. It’s the power point version of a slam book.

Here’s the inspirational film that turned Vicks around and was shown to all the people who had to come up with creative. There are kids laughing, there are people walking on the beach with fake film grain thrown in. it’s all about breathing life in. It has this pseudo Philip Glass soundtrack. You’ve seen this approximately 8 billion times. That said, the new Vicks stuff looks good. Breathe Life In is a lot more fun than the coughing-sneezing-aching woman in the bathrobe who’s gotta have some Nyquil. “Call in Well.” That’s a nice line.

You know, there’s kind of a trend in advertising of people in the snow about to Get It On. Snow: the new hot tub.

A contagious idea is not a stunt, but something viral. Not a one off, but a commitment. OK, now there’s some content here. Uh oh, another 2 graphics inspired by real viruses. This is not so good. He just asked, why did AIDS take 50 times longer to become a pandemic than swine flu? And the answer is, the means of transmission is quite different. Ugh. In what universe is it OK to use AIDS metaphors to make a point about marketing? You had me, you have so lost me.

Oh boy, now David Spade onscreen has me checking out of this even more.

“Charmin Contagious Idea.” Can the hole get deeper? Yes, it can, with Pottypalooza. I’m just reporting. Those bears. And yet, it wasn’t a stunt or a one off. They’ve been back with Charmin bathrooms in Times Squares 3 years running. Yep, in it for the long haul is Charmin. Sit or Squat. I’d give them props for totally speaking to what consumers off, but I’m still not over the stupid AIDS comment.

TV was the engine that kicked off a TGIF contest. Without TV, Woody gets 85K fans. He only hits the half million mark after 4 days of a giant TV spend. Just in case you thought you could get those TV dollars for your online campaign….you probably can’t. And there’s still trying to figure out what do with their nearly 1 million friends? How do you keep them? And honestly, you probably don’t want them, because your wall gets crazy.

OK, we’re wrapping up, and I’m too worn out to say anything else. See you in a few.

Freelancers Union: Cool Idea

I love the ads on the subway. The spouse and I still talk about the AIDS prevention serial comic that ran in the 80s, where Mirasol struggled with the fact that Jorge might have infected her. I so wish I could remember it more precisely in order to google it, but alas, cannot.

In second place, we have the Unintentionally Funniest Ad Campaign ever, Captain Morgan’s Comin’ Alive When It’s After Five from the 90s. Can’t find that one either.

Today, I saw an ad from this, the Freelancers Union. These folks have great looking ads (they should, given the insane amount of non-salaried writing and design talent out there). However, the ad I saw said something like, “The times have changed over the last 30 years. Alas.”

Yes, 30 years ago, I regularly employed terms like “alas,” “forsooth,” and the occasional “farthingale.” The problem is, I still use them today (exhibit A: paragraph 1). Look, blogs are narcissistic exercises where you’re supposed to be yourself. Ads aren’t. I cannot endorse any of the above words for subway ad usage. Fie.

The good news is, the rest of their stuff is pretty cool, and the organization itself is a great idea, though I can’t speak to its execution. Check them out.

ad:tech NY Day 2: Online Video Industry Forum 2:49 PM EST

Key takeaway: The well has a bottom, folks, and I believe I am seeing it.

Digital Video is the one bright spot in the current economy. There’s a bright spot, people! Really.

I think that moderator, Joey Trotz from Turner Broadcasting, was Sherman from Mr. Peabody as a kid. If he says “wayback machine” once in the next hour, my day will be made. There are too many video formats and we need standards, according to the IAB Digital Video Committee of which Joey is co-chair. Joey, when do you sleep? I shan’t pretend, I was really hoping to watch video and not – wait! The Count’s onscreen, taking time from his busy schedule adorning Lady Gaga’s skirt. Oh, he’s gone. Joey just admitted he loves “really geeky stuff.” Yeah, no lie there, dude. As I was saying, I was hoping for less of said really geeky stuff and more Exciting Video. Preferably featuring Lady Gaga.

Joey just said “xml spec.” Sigh.

Even sadder, he just said that video services don’t know when I’ve walked out of the room and gone to the bathroom and rather than thinking of the point he’s making, I’m just thinking that that sounds like A Good Idea. It’s the after lunch session. These are tough.

And we’re opening up for questions with nary a diversion other than the Count.

Mark Marvel of MSNBC says we need to get one pricing scheme that works. Rebecca Paoletti of Yahoo agrees, but hasn’t found a good way to bridge the efficacies to all the good things the web can do. You know, with all this admission that absolutely no one is making money…how are any of us here? This is starting to feel like Ed Wood dialogue: “All of us are interested in the future. For that is where we will spend the rest of our lives.” Ed, you were born too soon….

ACK!! At 2:55 p.m., Joey said, “I think I saw someone in the WAYBACK.” He meant the “way back” of the room, but I will take it as 50% wish fulfillment and that is AWESOME.

ad:tech NY Day 2: Transformation of News Media 12:54 PM EST

Key takeaway: These are scary times for newspapers. As if you didn’t know that.

Ok, this one definitely has the marquee panel, which in my lexicon means “panelists from things I’ve actually heard of.” There’s someone from NPR and the Times and CNN talking about “[how] leading news media companies …see the future, how they are innovating in the digital age and how they see the emerging value proposition for advertisers within this rapidly evolving ecosystem.” I’m REALLY interested in what these folks have to say, because the world is already so much like Blade Runner that it will really suck if you can’t figure out a way to sustain a content provider other than doing product placements within the articles, which I fear is possibly being considered as I write (“The Senate debated on health care for all Americans today, and enjoyed Orange Nehi while doing so. Nothing quenches like a Nehi.”) Writers need to make money in ways other than advertising, even if most of them are hacks.

Moderator Vivian Schiller of NPR says this session is NOT about dwindling newsrooms. Vivian, I admire your game face. Jeff Litvack of AP wants apps that give you multiple perspectives from multiple newspapers all at once. Kind of like The Week. I love The Week! It’s like Reader’s Digest for snobs. I subscribe to it and read it every Friday, because you can read a print magazine in the bathtub. Then I can pop off Interesting Facts and Join the Conversation.

Now Vivian brings up the elephantom: These apps are all free, right? Jeff says, yeah FOR NOW. Jeff thinks eventually apps can pay for themselves through advertising. I hope so, because by his own admission, every time they try to charge for an app, it tanks. Local market sales are key, he says. They’ll make a tremendous difference? Really? Because small business owners I know have a tough time scrounging up even a few hundred ad bucks. Kenneth (KC) Estenson of CNN doesn’t really see a subscription model. But they’ve had positive words from consumers about the ads in their apps. And anyway, CNN is huge enough at the moment they don’t sound terribly worried.

Vivian just said “local is the new black.” Heh. She also just said “hyperlocal.” It’s more local than local! Denise Warren from the New York Times says how do we get local content on the Times? She says you can’t have product innovation without process innovation, and that Apple brought design to the forefront of their process. The Times is now infusing technology into their storytelling process. She shows us a very low-end presentation that’s basically a screen capture of stuff you can do on the Times online. I’m a big fan of some of the rich media on the Times website, but we just looked at the words “The New York Times” on a black screen while some pseudo-techno music looped. Wow. Stuff like this is not going to get you to the next level, NYTimes preparers of presentations.

Man, everyone is utterly flummoxed by how to monetize online. “Getting really creative” and “using tools” are mentioned as solutions. Yikes.

Here’s Alisa Bowen of Thomson Reuters. She sounds Australian. She properly pronounced “niche”! Like everyone else, she’s in a “we’ll see” mode. Well, if answers were out there, someone would have sold them already.

“Relevance.” “Highly targeted niche content.” “Partnership” vs. “Healthy Competition.” “Stretch and Extend the core of what we’re all about…and the money will follow.” Wow again. You know, if those “do what you love and the money will follow” self-help books really worked, you know what we’d be? France, I think. Obama a socialist? HA. I wish…

CNN is doing great due to their multi-platformism, which sort of leaves the Times up a creek without a paddle wearing soggy clothes on a cold dark night, I think. Sigh. Thus ends yet another session of vague generalities and baseless hope. August Strindberg, you definitely have your place.

ad:tech NY Day 2: The Silent Click 11:47 AM EST

Key takeaway: Click through rate does not equal behavior. Measure engagement more fluidly.

That’s a good title. It sounds sort of menacing, like a radio show. “Did you hear that?” “What?” “The Silent Click.” “Why….no…..I…DID NOT.” That kind of thing. But this session is really about “the key behaviors that marketers can measure to understand the impact of these impressions to drive long-term brand preference.” Way to take the wind out of my sails. I don’t trust numbers, because, really, can’t you make those things say pretty much anything? Silent Click session, I enter you with a skeptical gleam in my eye.

comScore is all over this conference. They’re bringing the numbers in a big way. A study they did showed that people don’t click through any more, but they’re spending more time on content, says moderator Pam Horan of OPA. Pam’s a good moderator and makes up for the fact that there are no women on the panel otherwise. Thom Campbell from Intel doesn’t want to look at click through rate, but he looks at it anyway. Thom is schmoozing Christopher Actis from MediaVest the Walmart guy. Christopher said “We’re crushing Walgreens!” when Pam mis-introduced him (for which she earns my respect). Just in case you’ve been fooled by Walmart’s comfy-squeezy rebranding of late. Beneath that lovable exterior, the teeth of the shark gnash in anticipation of your innocently-proffered hand.

Gordon McLeod of WSJ Digital Network is the proxy for publishers. I wonder if he knows any of the people who write for the so-called WSJ op-ed page, which I like to think of as The Performance Art page. Have you read that thing? Obama’s all up in Fox’s grille, and the WSJ op-ed page just blithely sails under the radar. Christopher wants insight from his publishing partners, but measurement insights, not the stuff from the op-ed page, which is more like “insights.” Liz Ross, I miss you! Intel likes good content from its partners because that helps build the customer relationship, says Thom. There’s kind of a lot of talk of marriage here, marrying the right content with the right brand and then have numbers to tell the right story to the client. Thom says they have great success with Conan O’Brien online, but not on TV. While it’s a smaller audience, it’s a fairly awesomely engaged audience that actually ends up being a bigger audience. Sorry, that was a little confusing, but I’m pretty sure that’s not Thom’s fault. The brain’s a teeny bit addled. Why, just last night I bought a pair of black tights and in the light of day….they’re navy blue! The Broad is mixing it up on the legwear front! I’m exciting like that.

Hey, people need to stop mispronouncing “niche.” It’s nish or neesh. It doesn’t rhyme with stitch.

Christopher likes a Walmart program where enough of this certain kind of light bulb was used to shut down 3 coal plants. I’m sure the coal plant employees were thrilled with that one. Walmart: Good for the globe, for you….maybe not so much. But you’ll save money!!. I mean, look, when you are the 7th biggest revenue suck in the world, you kinda should be able to measure pretty impressively, right? Now Christopher is addressing an audience question about corporate responsibility. P.R. is essential. I’d say that’s an understatement. “Walmart is employing a pretty aggressive Listening Strategy in the social environments,” says Christopher. In other words, we’ll pretend to be your friend as we continue to Burrow Into Your Head. You know, the spouse always says American capitalist propaganda is SO much more skillful than anything every dispersed on Tass. Spouse, right again! It’s these little kudos that get you through 15 years of marriage folks, because honestly, you’re gonna have some lean periods. And with that relationship reference, we have come full circle, sort of. In fact, Gordon just said “softer and squishier.” It doesn’t get more relationship-y than that, I think.

Oh, yes we can! Pam wants to know if we’ll ever make people cry. Because that’s a measure of real love, I think: the degree that you can be devastated. That is not facetious. Oh, no, Apple is cited as great creative. And I just hate that campaign. You know a great campaign? This one. All that said, encouraging to hear that content is really, really important. Gremlins of digital media buying, you can’t kill creatives yet!

ad:tech NY Day 2: Global Perspectives 10:48 AM EST

Key takeaway: Are you American? Then you, my friend, have sort of missed the fast boat to China, India, and elsewhere.

This session dares to state that “dominant firms in the United States are laggards.” At my son’s book fair, he says that there’s a book called, “Go, Go, America!” I bet those authors would be pretty peeved about that quote. Laggards, indeed. Can this OUTRAGEOUS claim be backed up? Yes, I believe it can.

New keynote, intros. I get that you have to pimp your company, but if I was doing one of these things, I would twirl or throw confetti or something. Let the gremlins overtake me as The Most Important Group in the Agency, They can’t quench my Shine! No one gives them that right.

We just took a moment to introduce ourselves to our fellow conventioneers. I met someone very cool from Toronto; here’s her production company: www.cinefocus.com. The Broad is schmoozing! Toronto is across the pond from Ann Arbor, the pond being the Detroit River, which is a way less ironic use of “pond” than Sir uses when referencing a certain ocean. Sir has macro vision!

OK, this is about global perspectives and it’s all men again, and sort of a “watching paint dry” on the excitement meter so far. Hey, this is completely awesome: I have a Khan and a Shah on the panel. What are the odds of getting two people with conqueror names on the same panel? If only there were a Tsar and a Kaiser to round things out. Did you know that Kaiser is the German version of Caesar? Words are my currency, and I am a profligate spender. People, this is a cry for help.

OK, probably important: In Asia, they sell ad units in terms of exposure. Shah is saying that CPMs and CTRs are all they got from a measurement perspective. Also, people are not conditioned to everything being free. Those Asian content providers are looking like lucky ducks right about now, aren’t they. Mobile is in a much more prominent role in Asia and they’re already all over location-based marketing. Things start there at the low end of the market instead of the high end, like here. There’s a lot more room for experimentation in the rapidly developing Asian economies, unlike here, where everything takes forever. The US: Keeping progress as non-progressive as possible. That should be on our money.

What makes for a successful international expansion category? Sir, I hope you’re listening. First off, understand the local culture and language. It’s sad that it’s necessary to say this. Chris Ahearn of Thomson Reuters says you have to be domestic. Here’s Tero Ojampera from Nokia. He’s agreeing and saying that means you have to get what’s going on locally. And…I like Tero and he has cool glasses, but this is pretty basic. Jonathan Carson from Neilsen, the moderator: The US is the exception market. OK, this is REALLY about the fact that China and India especially and the rest of Asia (global in this case really means Asian) are are not just eating our lunch but we kind of are lunch. and one would be well advised to learn Chinese, and not so one can order a latte properly at the Starbucks in the Forbidden City but so that one can communicate with one’s boss.

ad:tech NY Keynote Day 2: Jonathan Miller 9:50 a.m. EST

Key takeaway: MySpace matters, especially if you have a vested interest in MySpace.

I googled Jonathan Miller and got a British opera and theater director. Woo-hoo! There are lots of Jonathan Millers out there. This is not that guy. This guy is from News Corporation, and he used to be at aol. He’s going to “discuss the future of digital advertising and the road ahead for marketers, publishers, agencies and ad networks.” And….I got nothin’. Here we go.

OK, in person Jonathan Miller looks more like James Woods than Jon Stewart, a) because he’s not wee, and b) if James Woods were a respectable businessman and not this once-brilliant actor who is now just kind of That Weirdly Needy Guy Who’s Not Denis Leary.

It is a day of disclosures: #1: The Broad is late. There are a variety of reasons, and all are good. However, I did get here in time to hear that Miller’s company News Corporation was just bought by – yes! – Sir’s company, WPP! I’m tellin’ you, Sir is a total juggernaut.

Now we’re talking about MySpace. JM says one of the great trends is….socialization! You know, it’s time for my own drinking game. Oh, poor JM, he’s stuck with MySpace. Drink 3 times whenever you hear someone from MySpace talk about how it’s still a player. Sort of like how that gold commercial revitalized MC Hammer’s career. Now JM’s talking about Twitter. It’s starting to flatten! Is it a hiccup? Is it nothing? Mr. MySpace guy, is your schadenfreude showing? My husband wanted to write a musical with that title, and all I can say is, Husband, stop stalling and write that thing. If nothing else, we’ll get the kids to perform it.

JM is excited about smart phones as your access point. We’re just getting to grips with that, and it’s an overall trend. Oh, and creatives are supposed to dominate in agencies. I am so making sure my boss sees this. But wait! Media is now supposed to rule the agency. Late to the party again, is the broad. Drew Iannini just called the media group “the gremlins” and JM agreed. Heh. If my dominant role as creative must be denied, at least I get to call the usurpers “gremlins.” That’s a win, I think.

ad:tech NY Final Keynote 9:36 p.m. EST

Key takeaway: Commercials are not commercials. Commercials are content.

Phew. Day 1 is nearing its end. Soon, I can stop typing. It’s a good thing I love to type. Seriously, transcribing audio really can be kind of a fun way to spend your day. You just type and type. Bring back the dictaphone! That’s what I’d like. I once interviewed a screenwriter who mentioned “Don Quixote” and the transcriptionist typed “Donkey Quote?!” Those are her punctuation marks.

OK, this is a pretty skint session. Great big room, not many people. Geoff Ramsey is our moderator. He sounds famous. He should be famous. This guy can present, he’s owning some serious razzle dazzle here. Hey, it’s a power point with a cool retro picture. Now things are spinning. Star wipe!! Ok, there was no star wipe. But There Should Have Been.

I like Geoff. He’s making us laugh. He says numbers don’t make sense. This, in my book, makes him a rock star. Online video viewing is mostly short content: Snippets and snacking and Tina Fey as Sarah Palin and watching the inauguration at work when you’re supposed to be, well, working. However, barely any marketing dollars get spent on online video. It’s growing faster than everything else, but it’s still less than 2% of the money that goes to TV. We’re in the early days of targeting and measurement, and there’s a long way to go.

Suzie Reider is the CMO at the YouTube. Wow, the shift from elephants to gorillas is complete. Also, everyone is wearing boots. Well, everyone female. Except the Broad. For she is an individualist. No one can tame her! Anyone, instead of thinking content as UGC or long form or short form, we need to just think of it as “content people like.” That’s cool. She’s basically saying stop boxing things up and just open your head up a little. She’s talking about the way people get very stream of consciousness in their video choices. They could go from watching something on how to put on make up to thinking, hey, this reminds me of Lady Gaga to hey, that is one weird muppet-inspired dress that the Gaga is rocking. (Ok, Suzie didn’t bring up the muppet couture, but seriously, what is that?)

Now we have Ira Rubenstein of Marvel and Robert Hayes of Showtime. Uh-oh, Californication was mentioned. Man, I hate that show. David Duchovny is the Master Skeev. Robert says socialization of media is the number 1 thing on his mind re: this topic.

From Geoff: Will we ever get to the same consumption as Tv? A resounding yes from Suzie. YouTube’s already there, view-wise. Ira says everything blurring. It doesn’t matter where people watch it, but Geoff interjects that that’s a big argument: Is watching on a computer fundamentally different from watching on a computer? So yeah, and probably more debate than we have time to cover.

Interesting to note: I asked the panel if, once these great content providers get tapped by a brand, do they lose their cred? They argued pretty well that the content providers already have their own brand, so to speak, and they don’t want to blow their cred. So provided the agreement’s spelled out pretty clearly, getting someone to schill your product when they’ve already established how much they like it is a good move provided you set some clear boundaries.

Anyway, I’ve written way too much. Suffice it to say this was the best session of the day, with best quote coming from Suzie: Commercials are content, so they better be good. Viewers don’t make the distinctions, they don’t put everything in nicely labeled boxes the way marketers do, and a great Nike commercial will get played as much as a great UGC video or a decent movie clip.